There will come a day when I will look back fondly on waking sleeping children and forcing them to go to a place that they do not want to go. I will miss these days of having two children in my nest to care for.
All I ever wanted to be was a mother. There is a book in a box in my attic that says where do you see yourself in 10 years? My entry? Married with two children and a dog. Nailed it! The thing is I never thought about the "and then after that" part.
I will be not quite 50 when my youngest takes flight. What then? I have zero interest in going back to school. I have zero interest in doing what I was doing before children, not to mention the fact that it is no longer done the way I did it so I am antiquated anyway. I am sure from a resume standpoint I am not marketable but that is so very not true. The experiences I have gained from managing a household for the past 20 years are invaluable. I will say that I am confident that I have zero desire to do laundry, cook meals, or clean a house for a living. Not my forte.
I don't even know where to start to dream! I love to write. I love to make people laugh. I dream of standing in large venues connecting with thousands of people but how do I get there from here? I have no fear of speaking before large crowds, but I have no idea how to make my dream come true.
In my bible study we have been speaking of making sure we are in God's will and doing life in the order of which God desires. Therefore, it is my firm belief that God knows my heart and wants what is best for me so I will keep on keeping on until I figure out his next path for me. Meanwhile I will enjoy the fleeting moments of my full nest and enjoy that which I sometimes do not enjoy knowing fully that I will miss it when it is gone. If my kids ever read this, you two are the joy of my life, even when you drive me crazy. Thank you for fulfilling a dream of mine!
Now....Go out...Be kind!
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