21 years ago.

21 years ago today I went on what was supposed to be me and my friend's brother chaperoning for her date with her new boy friend. She had asked me in church if I would please go with her to Les Miserables because she wanted to go on a date with a boy from youth group and the only way her mom would let her go was if her older brother went along to drive. The older brother didn't want to go be a third wheel and so my friend thought that she would play matchmaker and kill two birds with one stone. Apparently, her brother had one killer crush on me and had had it for quite some time but was too painfully shy to admit it. Me being the social butterfly that I was was too clueless to notice it and it was all news to me that this was all a setup.

After church we went to the LN station where there used to be a Ruby Tuesdays and I had the most disgusting Chimichanga on the face of this earth. I had no idea what one was but I thought it sounded funny so I ordered it. My "date" had placed a rose in my chair and I started to realize...Hold up! Am I on a date? We went to the musical and my date was bored into a lovely Sunday afternoon nap and all in all it was a lovely afternoon.

We were in youth group together and that date had opened the conversation. We now had stuff to talk about and fast forward 21 years here we are married with two kids, a mortgage, and a dog.

My now sister in law eventually broke up with her date, and is happily married with two kids and a dog of her own to a man she met at Olive Garden but that is a different story.

My sweet chaperone partner and I have been through a lot of stuff. Break up / Get back together. Laughter. Tears. Deaths. Births. We have practically grown up together. I will say this about marriage. It is hard. It isn't easy. There are going to be days that you don't like your partner very much but be honest with yourself. There are days where you don't like yourself very much and how do you handle that situation? You have made a vow to God to love this person, and please keep in mind that Love is a verb not a feeling, and what are you going to do about it?

My husband knows me. Good, bad, or indifferent he knows me and he loves me. Just like I know my husband my guess is better than anyone on the planet, and it is my joy to be his wife. He probably won't read this, but at least I put it out there!

I love Mr. Tim!

Now, before you go all crazy on me because you know my husband's name is not Tim hear me out. Many a year ago when we were living 30 minutes away from everything in our lives and Michael wasn't getting home until 8pm or so we hired Mr. Tim. Mr. Tim has mowed our grass since the kids were tiny. He will stop and push them on the swing or throw a ball. If he finds a frog he will pick it up and show it to the kids. The dog even loves Mr. Tim and she isn't fond of most men. It is always so nice to see his truck pull up to the house especially when the kids were small and Mr. Tim was my only adult conversation for that day. He will always be a cherished member of our family!

I could leave it at that. You can love a person for much less, but that is not what caused me to write a blog about my wonderful Mr. Tim. Gardening and plants have always been an aspect of my life growing up. My dear sweet grandmother had a green thumb before it was even a thing to have a green thumb. I remember a very steep hillside right next to her driveway that in the spring would be covered in creeping phlox and daffodils and tulips and hyacinths. It was gorgeous. She had two gardens that she would work very hard in, and when it was time she would pickle, can and freeze all that had come from them.

My parents have inherited that obsession. Their beautiful yard is like a botanical garden. I love the story of the Hosta association. My father started collecting hostas. He noticed one day that there was a club for hosta lovers and called to see what it was all about. The President of the club was a little rude and joked about how daddy wouldn't have enough varieties of the plant to beat him. Daddy asked how many do you have? The reply was something like 16, and the man was very proud of his 16 different varieties. Daddy simply told him Oh, well I have over a hundred. The man was shocked and of course wanted daddy to join the club but one of the most wonderful things about my daddy is that he is not uppity and this man had proven that the club was way too uppity for his taste.

My parents yard is tranquil and serene. You can go there and unwind and just enjoy all that God has created. Huge shade trees, a waterfall, stone benches to just enjoy the breeze, a swing...perfection in a backyard.

So, long ago I knew that I wanted to recreate my parents yard in my own yard and my mother had given me 3 of my favorite bushes...lilacs!! I love lilacs! They are pretty and smell wonderful. Back in the spring when we were about to move I knew without a doubt that those plants were going with me. I would even put it in the contract if need be my plants were coming with me. Yesterday, Mr. Tim called. He asked me if I wanted him to move my babies. My babies. How well he knows me. He knew that the time was right because the plants were dormant and he dug them up and transplanted them with great care. He drove them to my new house and placed them gently in their new homes. They look like they have always been there and I can't wait to see them in the spring!!! It is the little things in life that form the best kind of happiness!

Today in your life I want you to think about a little thing that makes you happy. I am completely ecstatic that my lilacs are here at the new house. It is crazy how happy it has made me. What small thing can put a smile on your face? Is there a certain drink that you like or a dessert? Do you like to drive home the long way with the winding roads? Take a minute for yourself today. Put a smile on your own face. Don't feel guilty about it just enjoy something genuinely and remember God loves you very much!

How many friends do you have?

Okay, this isn't a competition it is mainly an observation on my part. I had my son first and while I want for him to have friends it doesn't seem to be as much of an issue for boys. You give a group of boys a ball and they all just figure it out ball equals play and its on. Sure you have ball hogs and other sorts but for the most part they figure it out. Girls on the other hand OH MY WORD! I don't remember this from my childhood so I'm not sure what the deal is but this whole she's not my friend because she looked at me twice or she said I wasn't her friend anymore because I had white milk instead of chocolate milk. For goodness sake!

So, I started remembering my friendships from elementary school. You know the ones that have stood the test of time. Elementary....None. Not one. Sure I have reconnected with a few people on facebook but tried and true know my kids, speak to on a regular basis, know my likes and dislikes friends not one. I'm sitting here making sure but I'm pretty sure...nope. Not one. Okay, so take it to middle school. Again facebook has played a large role here so the number bumps up to 3. 3 women that if I were to call them I would A. have their telephone number and B. Be able to talk to without it being weird. Okay, so high school. So, those three are from middle school so I can't count those so.....Hmmm. From actual high school? Okay this is getting difficult. My point is NOT MANY!!! College and Work and Kids. That is where the beef of my friendships come from.

I can count on 1 hand the amount of people that know secrets that would actually embarrass me. You know the people that if you were to call them at 3 in the morning they wouldn't hang up on you? The ones that were there when you have lost a loved one. The ones that your kids know?

I want to tell you a few of my favorite memories, mainly because I am pretty sure I'm the only one reading this stuff and because I can.

One year I gave up chocolate as a New Years resolution. I don't know why I just did, and back then I took my resolutions very seriously. So, I had made it the entire year without taking even one bite of chocolate. I felt so empowered. New Years Eve of the upcoming year my husband and I decided to have dinner with a dear friend and her husband. I would make dinner and then we would go to their house for dessert and the countdown with Dick Clark. We got to her house and I could smell it. Chocolate EVERYTHING. She had made cakes and pies and her famous cookies. As the New Year started to count down my wonderful friend grabbed a cookie and as the clock struck midnight she shoved a cookie in my mouth! Best cookie ever! Sweetest friend ever. This is a friend that has the goods on me and would not be afraid to use it if need be. She will remain nameless but she knows who she is....I love you, sweetie!

I just want to say that in order to have a friend you have to be a friend. It isn't about what you do for someone, because if it is then they aren't really your friend they are a moocher and you need to run away. It is general give and take sometimes you are the listener sometimes you are the talker. Sometimes you are the one pulling the other one out, sometimes you are armpit into it and have to let them get you out! Sit there right now and think who do you really love? Not love love like naked love or parental love I mean you are very happy that God has put them in your life to help make your load lighter! Have you told them? They would probably like to hear it.

One other thing. That sweet friend tried to send me her fabulous cookies for Christmas and are you ready for this? The mailman ate them! The only thing she got back was parts of the top of the box. Not a happy me.

Funny without trying to be.

My daughter has always wanted to be able to hold an adult conversation even though she is way too young and does not have the vocabulary to keep up. Her sentences are sometimes part words part noises that sound like words with great expression and hand gesturing.

Sometimes she gets words wrong but if they are big she keeps using them wrong or not. For example. She is convinced that the word for crutches is actually crotches. Now, I have tried to correct her but for some reason in her head the sticks you put under your arms that help you walk when you can't put pressure on your foot or feet are crotches. Now, it isn't like you talk about crutches every day so I had forgotten this little detail tonight as we were out and about and I got quite a shock when I heard my precious angel say....Mommy, look how pretty that lady decorated her crotch for Christmas! Now, I was fully prepared to turn around and see some hoochie mama with twinkly lights on her hoo ha, because you just never know with some people. I was completely relieved to turn around and see a poor child that had wrapped tinsel all up and down the crutch she was using. I yet once again explained to my youngest, Sweetie. Those are called crutches not crotches. What is a crotch mommy? Well, it is your private parts. Without missing a beat she said Oh, I guess you wouldn't want to decorate that for Christmas would you?!

Oh my word I love my baby girl! Such joy she brings me. Don't you dare ask her about this because I wouldn't want to embarrass her. I'm mainly writing it so I don't forget it!