If I should die before I wake...

We are not promised tomorrow.  Anyone of us could have any number of things happen to us and not be here one minute from now.  I'm not trying to be morbid but more so realistic.  If this were to happen to me there are some things I would want the world to know and I would want to have the last word.

1. If you were to hear of my death I am going to need you to gather a group of friends and sing all 5 verses to The Wonderful Grace of Jesus.  The more elaborate the better.  Kudos to the person who gets a full orchestra.  I don't need classically trained vocalists because I want people that are singing from their hearts.  I'm going to be watching.  I will know who respected my final wishes and I'm not trying to scare you or anything but I will haunt you if you don't.

2.  If anyone cries at my funeral let it only be because they are laughing so hard at a memory of me.  I am in a much better place than this world do not cry for me.  Laugh because I brought you joy and if you didn't like me...laugh because you no longer have to deal with me but no tears okay?

3.  To my immediate family I loved each and everyone of you with my whole heart.  That is not to say that you did not drive me insane at one time or another but you were my world.  I did not care about climbing a corporate ladder or finding fame I wanted to know that each of you always felt loved.

4. To my friends, and by friends I pretty much mean any human that ever returned my smile.  I want each and every one of you to know you are loved, you are good enough.  If you feel like no one likes you.  Like everyone hates you.  Please know that everyone feels like this every once in awhile, you are human, but you are also wrong.  It isn't that people don't like you it is that people are so self absorbed thinking that other people hate them that they don't take the time to love on others.  Go out and do something nice for someone and just see how quickly your own perspective changes.

5.  To the person who has to clean up my stuff.  Bless your heart.  The reason I was keeping all of this stuff was because I was completely convinced that I would need it again someday.  It's good stuff.  I just don't need it where I'm going.  Don't just throw it away, I will be watching and I will totally judge you highly.

6. To my non-Christian friends.  I have failed you miserably.  I never wanted to beat you over the head with the knowledge of the Love of Jesus.  I didn't want you to think I was judging you and thinking that I was better than you.  I am a horribly flawed individual it is only because Jesus loves me that I have hope and guess what...he loves you too...just exactly as you are whether you like it or not he loves you.  Could you at the very least read a book?  There is one called The case for Christ that is really good.  I haven't read it because I was not a reader, my attention span was way more Squirrel level than that, but I hear good things.

7. I would also like to go on record to say that no matter what you have heard of me or how weird you may think that I am I have never taken even the first sip of alcohol or done drugs.  It was just never something I wanted to do, and after awhile it just became something I wanted to see how long I could keep it going.  Not the drug part that stuff will kill you, but the alcohol part.  I will say that I would have liked to have tried a glass of wine just to see what it tasted like but it would have needed to be a very sweet wine because I have the tastebuds of a 3 year old.  I never had the first cup of coffee either for this very reason.  I know that I may appear weird or half drunk part of the time but that is just my God given personality.  Can you imagine if I did delve into the world of narcotics and hallucinogens?  Would not have been pretty.

To be honest these are things I don't care that you know even with me still around which is why I wrote them.  You are loved my friends.  Very much so, by me.  Have a great day and I will see you later!

Just as you are.

Do not ask me to talk politics with you.  I won't.  It isn't that I am uneducated or naive.  It isn't that I am too immature or that I am only interested in trivial things.  It is more so that I despise arguing and 9 times out of 10 a conversation involving politics will in some way eventually come to a disagreement.

I will not argue over which candidate is better because I am well aware that both candidates are human and both candidates will do or have done things that will disappoint me or go against that which I believe in.  I have been disappointed before by having the election not go the way I wanted it to and the world is still spinning.  Do I think this world is worse than it was how many ever years ago?  Yes, yes I do.  Do I think that this is something new under the sun?  No, no I do not.  I'm pretty sure if I had lived in the 60's I would have thought that was the end of times as well.

I am a Christian.  My hope, my future, my joy comes from the Lord.  You might not believe in God.  You might think that my beliefs make me naive or wrong.  Again, we would come to an argument and if you will look back, I don't like to argue.  I will not argue with you.  I have not walked your path.  I have not been dealt the hand that you have been dealt.  I too have been disappointed by other Christians, by the church.  I too have seen behind the veil and been disappointed by humans, but I will tell you that those disappointments have never come from God.  They have come from humans.  Silly, stupid, misinformed, sad, dejected humans.

It's okay you know..for us to disagree.  If we all had the same opinion on everything and did everything the same way what a boring world this would be.  There is a place for the brainiacs, for the free thinkers, there is a place for the habitually disorganized and the OCD organizers.  We all make up this crazy world that we live in and that's why it works.

Please understand this.  The God I serve is made of Love.  The pain that you may have felt or been dealt is not from him it is from the sin that is in this world.  God loves you, just as you are, not like some human is telling you you have to be.  Just as you are.

Band Geek and proud of it!!

It is fall.  My kids are both in middle school and I am hormonal.  I am reminiscing about my own childhood and I am contemplating something.  

I can remember my 8th grade year trying to decide whether I was going to stay in choir as I had always done or if I was going to try something new.  The color guard looked interesting to me and I knew nothing about it so I went for it.  I am so very glad I did and I am thankful for the life lessons and memories that came along with my band experience.  I was in color guard for two years and I was the drum major for two years.  I knew nothing of marching band prior to my experience, but I was quickly thrown in to the grueling painstaking repetitive hot practices that make up the half time marching band shows.  

They must learn to glide, not walk and play an instrument all whilst maintaining the overall visual picture that the audience gets to be wowed by.  If done correctly marching band is quite impressive.  

My son is playing football this year so I am experiencing football from a completely different perspective.  I am now watching from the perspective that these boys have put their blood, sweat and tears into hot practices to either protect or move the ball up and down the field.  To watch a child throw the ball down field and then see another player accurately catch and carry that same ball on down the field for a touchdown is also like music just a completely different song.  To see the defense stop their opponent also quite impressive.  

I could go through every single sport or activity that children pride themselves in learning or participating in and none is less than the other just different.  

Come friday night by all means cheer for that impressive catch or crazy long touch down but also instead of getting up during half time to get a snack or pee stay to watch the half time show.  Those kids have worked just as hard for their 15 min of fame they deserve your attention too.  Look for the Wow factor because I have to tell you I just watched a line of kids playing marimbas with two mallets in each hand.  You try to do that, you will be impressed or you are dead on the inside.