I tried it. Twice, and I'm over it. I am not supposed to run a 5K. It is not on my life to do list apparently. The first time I started the weather got so horrible and my family all got sick and I couldn't continue. This time I started and without knowing it I broke my foot. How on earth do you break your foot without knowing it? I will tell you reader, you try to start to train for a 5k with no advanced warning to your body and start pounding its parts with 50 pounds of overweightness crashing down on it. I'm surprised it was only my foot. I'm surprised my whole body did not go into revolt stage and just laugh at me and shut down.
What on earth was I thinking? It is just the way I function. I am not a planner by nature. I am more a spur of the moment girl. I like to just do it and do it now. If I decide I want to paint a room I don't move the furniture or even shake the paint I just slap paint on the wall. I'm not saying it is a good character trait I'm just stating facts.
My husband is the planner. He can plan the crap out of anything. To the point that it never gets done because he hasn't had subparticle B meeting A about the progession of the decision and the after effects of what might happen if plot marker Q and substance V are not present, and that is just whether we should buy Charmin or Northern. Quilted or plain. Super roll or large roll. I say pick the first one you see and go. Preferably the cheapest.
So, I will have to find another way to lose the weight. I would like to lose 50 pounds. This is what I want to do. How? I'm not sure. I went to the gym this morning and it was okay but a little boring. So I came home and ate an early lunch followed with a nice big piece of cake. Hmmm. That doesn't seem very productive does it now.
I will let you know how it goes sweet reader. Don't tell me to not eat chocolate because I'm just going to not like you.
I get it eat less exercise more. BIG problem with that. If I exercise more I get hungry more...DUH!!! Never you fear. I will figure it out. I promise and I will let you know. Oh, and if you are going to respond to this please don't tell me how to do it because I won't listen anyway I have heard it all and I need action so if you feel the need to respond in some way just drive your tiny booty up here and walk with me. K? Otherwise, shut up a little.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Lost.
Okay, so my life has been pretty well laid out to this point. The first 5 years are pretty much a blur and I wasn't responsible for them anyway, then onto kindergarten and follow the progression of school years up luckily I never had to repeat one. After elementary, middle after middle, high and then graduate. I knew that I would go to college after that although I am sad to say I had never thought about what I wanted to do with the rest of my life so I got a very generic degree that has somewhat served me only as having graduated from college. After college graduation I got a job, got married and had kids.
See, it is an easy progression that just fluidly continues until you get to now. Modern day. My kids are both in school, but they still need me. My schedule is not my own, my time is not my own and I am lost. I would go back to school but there really isn't time. I don't have time now for all of the things that I am supposed to be doing and if you add school and homework and whatnot where would that leave me? Plus, I don't know what I would go to school for! There isn't anything that jumps out and says "I am your destiny!" okay, there is but it seems impossible!
I would love to be a Christian comedian motivational speaker. There, I've said it. That's what I want to do with the rest of my life. I would like to travel around and help people smile and see that their lives aren't quite so overwhelming as they may seem, and tell them that they aren't as alone as they feel. This is what I want to do! I love to make people laugh, I love to see people smile. I want to be one of those Women of Faith. I don't even have to be a Woman of Faith. I could be a Girl of Faith or a Handmaiden of Faith. I just want to get my foot in the door. Matthew 7:7 comes to mind. Ask and it will be given unto you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will open unto you. Okay, so, who do I ask, where do I seek and what door am I supposed to be knocking on?
I have the public speaker gene in my blood because of my daddy and I know I could do it because I love to perform. So, where do I go from here?
This is where the depression kicks in. This is when I eat an entire box of girl scout cookies because the reality is way to overwhelming. I will just keep writing and I will hopefully figure it out. Someday...you know before I die and all. Or eat too many thin mints. Must find path.
See, it is an easy progression that just fluidly continues until you get to now. Modern day. My kids are both in school, but they still need me. My schedule is not my own, my time is not my own and I am lost. I would go back to school but there really isn't time. I don't have time now for all of the things that I am supposed to be doing and if you add school and homework and whatnot where would that leave me? Plus, I don't know what I would go to school for! There isn't anything that jumps out and says "I am your destiny!" okay, there is but it seems impossible!
I would love to be a Christian comedian motivational speaker. There, I've said it. That's what I want to do with the rest of my life. I would like to travel around and help people smile and see that their lives aren't quite so overwhelming as they may seem, and tell them that they aren't as alone as they feel. This is what I want to do! I love to make people laugh, I love to see people smile. I want to be one of those Women of Faith. I don't even have to be a Woman of Faith. I could be a Girl of Faith or a Handmaiden of Faith. I just want to get my foot in the door. Matthew 7:7 comes to mind. Ask and it will be given unto you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will open unto you. Okay, so, who do I ask, where do I seek and what door am I supposed to be knocking on?
I have the public speaker gene in my blood because of my daddy and I know I could do it because I love to perform. So, where do I go from here?
This is where the depression kicks in. This is when I eat an entire box of girl scout cookies because the reality is way to overwhelming. I will just keep writing and I will hopefully figure it out. Someday...you know before I die and all. Or eat too many thin mints. Must find path.
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