The tale of a brunette and a pumpkin muffin.

I am writing this entry to honor all my friends who are highly intelligent blondes and have gotten a bad rap for a few ditzy light haired individuals that because of their actions have created the whole "Blonde joke" phenomenon.  Here is my story.

I love pumpkin muffins.  I specifically love Einsteins brothers pumpkin muffins that are really more like a pumpkin cupcake with cream cheese frosting.  Every year they come out at the end of August and then by the middle of November they slowly run out and do not reorder so they are typically gone before Thanksgiving.  I know this.  I'm not proud of it but I do.

So, this afternoon when I hadn't eaten all day and I had picked the kids up from school I thought, hey!  I can go to Einsteins and maybe there will be a pumpkin muffin left.

I entered the store.  In the case were 3 beautiful, even if they were lightly frosted pumpkin muffins.  I placed my order and then said "and a pumpkin muffin."  The BRUNETTE working the register said we don't have pumpkin muffins anymore we are all out.  I said What?  She said We have sold out of them for the season and we will not be replacing them?  I said so the three that are in the case they aren't for sale?  She looked at the case.  (Here is where she could have saved herself but alas no.) She could see the pumpkin muffins, obviously for sale, she said in a rude almost contemptuous voice We are out of pumpkin muffins.

Luckily, I didn't have to get my ugly out.  The manager who is a friend of mine (this may or may not have something to do with my love of pumpkin muffins) came over and said to the girl Yes, we do we have three.  She said but you said that we weren't going to order anymore pumpkin products.  He said well, no we aren't but we would like to sell the ones we have.

Wow.

(The pumpkin muffin pictured above is not the one from today.  The one pictured above has the perfect amount of frosting and the person who was responsible for this little bit of fabulousness should be given some sort of medal.)

Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda.

Does anyone else have little things that they wish they had done?  Not really regrets because then you wouldn't be where you are today but things that you wonder how life would be different if you had stuck with them?  I do.

1. I love to sing.  I used to have a pretty nice voice.  I was in choir and ensembles and I loved to sing and for people to tell me what a nice voice I had.  Well, I lost it.  Now don't get me wrong I can still whip it out when need be but I don't sing as much as I used to.  I don't know why.  I know where the downfall started.  It was born out of vanity.  I mustered every ounce of courage I had to sing in a talent show.  I thought I did ok but I didn't win.  It wounded me somehow.  I guess I felt like I wasn't good enough and from that point forward I just didn't find the joy in singing that I had always found.  I went off to college and I didn't join the choir.  I didn't technically know how to read music and I didn't want to be embarrassed.

How sad.  Singing brings me joy.  I allowed my own vanity to rob me of joy.  Stupid.

2. I wanted to be a teacher.  I was the President of the Future Teacher's of America.  I thought it would be a wonderful profession.  I don't even know why this one didn't happen, but right now I am so weary of picking up messes and correcting and what not that at this point in time in my life I'm just not there.

3. I wanted to be the next Diane Sawyer.  I have a resume tape to prove it.  I was really bad but I have the resume tape to prove that too!

I guess the point of this post is to touch on the fact that we all have shortcomings.  We all have things in our lives that we wish we had done differently.  I want to not focus on the fact that I have failed at something I want to focus on what I can do in the future to bring joy.  Not only for myself but for others as well.

Want to know a secret?  I want to be a motivational speaker or story teller.  I love to make people laugh.   I realize that at this season of my life I am currently not at liberty to devote so much of my time to a dream but I just wanted to write down on paper that it is in there, that hope in the back of my head.  I would love to get up on a stage and stand before thousands of people and make them come together through laughter.  I don't know how I'm going to get there but I want to do it, and I wanted to say it out loud so that maybe just maybe someday it could happen.

Parable in a lunch time rush.

My day was a harried at best.  I knew the errands I had to run and on paper they really shouldn't have taken that long, but that was not cyphering in the lunchtime factor and the fact that A. It is friday. B. Nothing goes fast at lunch time on friday.  I made it to all the places I needed to go but not without two lovely tales to tell and lessons to be learned from them.

1. I walked into the post office and I was extremely excited to be the 2nd person in line and two postal clerks working.  This should go fast I naively thought to myself.  My attention was drawn to 60's plus woman number 1.  She was attempting to mail a package.  She wanted it insured for $500.  It was a cell phone for her daughter who had dropped her phone in a canal in Italy.  Her daughter has lost no less than 5 phones and the mother has repeated this process every time.  She doesn't understand how her daughter could be so careless.  She repeated all of which I told you just now over and over in different orders and loudly so that all could hear.  How her daughter was in Italy.  How she was the person who had to keep buying these phones to replace the ones that had been lost in a canal.  How she wanted it insured for FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS!!!

Anyone want to take a jab at what I'm bothered with in this scenario?  No, it is not that I have now officially been in line 20 minutes.  The age of this woman says to me that this careless phone dropper is at the very least in her 20's.  If she has indeed lost 5 phones, why is this mother replacing the phones so easily?  Why is she expected to drop what she is doing and OVERNIGHT  a phone to Italy?  Which by the way the post office can not do.

At first I wanted to smack the woman for holding us all up with her questions and her uncertainty but I quickly was more frustrated with this girl who from Italy was effecting my life because of her carelessness.    Lesson here...your actions have ramifications.  Be ye kind to those around you.

2. Since I'm just standing in line waiting for either one of the postal clerks to finish up I have time to look around and observe.  In front of me stands another 60 plus woman in brand spankin' new jeans.  Want to know how I know they were brand spankin' new?  You know how with jeans they put these long sometimes white sometimes clear stickers on the pant of the leg with the size over and over again so that no matter how they are folded you can read the size?  Well, hers was white and it was very much still in place right next to a 5 x 7 sticker with all the attributes of this particular pair of jeans.  Tummy control, hidden stretch no gap waist band, all written clear as you please on this woman's rear for all to read.  So, I very discreetly walked over to her and whispered..You forgot to remove the sticker from your jeans.

Now, if some stranger told me this I would be thrilled.  A. I'm never going to see them again so who cares.  B. I would be more embarrassed if someone I knew found it.  Was this woman appreciative?  Was she kind?  Oh, heavens no.  Now, I'm not exactly sure what I was expecting because it would be embarrassing but at the very least a little humility.  This woman was hateful and rude about it.  I wished I hadn't told her.  I will say that when she ripped it off she only got one of them so I didn't make it a point to point out the other one.  Boo yah!   Lesson here...your actions have ramifications.  Be ye kind to those around you.  :)

Have a great day!

Washington listen up!!!

I'm not a political person.  I can not stand it when my husband is watching those news shows where the "experts" are arguing over this or that and what was meant and what the ramifications will be if person A does this to person B.  I could care less.  I hate drama.  I hate arguing.  I apparently hate government.

I don't though, that's just it.  I love the foundation by which our country was built on.  I love the people that make up our country.  I am humbled by those men and women that sacrifice each and every day to make sure that our freedoms are protected.

Today I went to a Veteran's day program at my children's school.  I sat there with tear filled eyes at things like the Pledge of Allegiance and the Star Spangled Banner.  I am proud to be an American.  I am thankful for the many freedoms that are afforded me because of all the men and women who for centuries have been making decisions that are for the good of our fine country.

So, that leads me to what's wrong now?  Our forefathers have argued since day one over what is right and what is best for our country.  What is different now that they can't come to a conclusion?  I think it is time for our officials to reboot.

My suggestion would be for all of our Congressmen and Senators to go home.  Go home and talk to your people.  Not the business leaders with deep pockets or the local government.  I mean go home and talk to the Veterans, the school teachers, the nurses, the volunteer coaches, the person that works a full time job and volunteers in the community the hours of a full time job.  Talk to the people who are having to take your policies and make them work and ask them what the kinks are.  Ask them what would work better, and then go back to Washington and fight for that.

I sat in that Veteran's program knowing that America will be okay, because while the decisions that higher government is making could harm us it won't change who we are.  We are a helping hand, we are a pat on the back, we are a lifeline, and while just like anything else we have our bad spots you can't dwell on that.  Corruption, greed, and selfishness are all going to rear their ugly head in Washington.  Put on the armor of what is good and stay strong fighting for what is right for the next 200  years and beyond.

God Bless America!

All the single ladies!

A friend of mine recently posted a blog entry that included 5 questions that single people are tired of hearing.  I was appalled at the forwardness of the questions but she assures me that they are real and are asked frequently.  So, because I adore this woman and I find her life to be a completely fantastic journey.  I would like to take a moment and have her back if you don't mind.  You might want to back up because I'm about to open a can.

Question number 1.  What's wrong with you?
(Now, just imagine me popping from behind her with something like this.)
What is wrong with her?  What is wrong with you!  Who, in their right mind walks up to another human being and asks what is wrong with them?  You assume because she has not found a spouse that means she has not found happiness?   I would present that unless you are able to find happiness within yourself without the help of another person you are not yourself happy so...WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!?! Why can't you be happy without a husband?  I would like to add would you walk up to a biker dude with more leather than skin and tattoos completely covering his person and ask what's wrong with him?  He's not like you so if we are being fair here you totally should.  Mainly just because I think a good punch in the face would help your situation.

Who will take care of you when you are old?
Ok.  Now this is a legitimate question.  Albeit random but it is also legitimate.  However, this isn't just for the single people on the planet.  Just because you can procreate does not make you a good parent, and just because you have children does not necessarily mean that they are going to take care of you when you are old.  If you are this forward with a friend my guess is you are just as intrusive with your kids so I would prepare thyself for a home baby!

Do you like men?
Again.  Random.  Is this to assume that because you have not found a spouse then the only other obvious answer is that you are gay?  Seriously?  My friend has been busy getting a doctorate, working on building her career whether or not she likes men is irrelevant.  Why don't you ask her if she has time for men?

You're not being too picky are you?
Oh honey.  This one doesn't even deserve a response but here goes.  Are you aware that the divorce rate in America is over 50%?  Do you realize that that means that 50% of the couples out there have decided that the spouse that they went with was not worthy of staying with?  So, if I am taking my time, and I am taking care to make sure that each decision in my life is made with intention so that I will  be able to live a life that has little regret then sure I'm picky.

What happened?
This one is short and sweet.
I was way too busy making a name for myself that I didn't have time to take someone elses!

To all my friends that have not found a spouse or are not currently in a relationship.  Live this day to its fullest.  Know that you alone are enough.  You alone are fabulous, and if anyone asks you any of these questions ever again please have me on speed dial because I have some aggression I would love to get out.

Entitled.

I've been hearing the word entitled bandied about a lot lately.  First off, I want to go on the record as stating that it is my firm belief that if you would live your life feeling that you are entitled to nothing then contentment is sure to follow.

Let's talk about where I have heard this lovely little word that is now on my least favorite words list almost topping infested but not quite.

1. I hear it in the news.  I hear people talking about how because we pay taxes we are entitled to this or that.  Sure, you can think that way but I can guaran-dang-tee you that you will never be fully satisfied with the way your tax dollars are being spent.  I would also go as far to say that if you were allowed to see how your hard earned money is being wasted a lot of the time you would throw up.  You can't look at it that way, you will drive yourself crazy.  It's just like the electric bill or the water bill, you just have to pay it.  Now sure , there are ways that you can not pay as much by turning off lights or taking only 20 second showers but for the most part it is what it is.  There have always been taxes they are there to fund programs that we need for safety, education, and well-being.  If you are concerned as to how those funds are being spent then by all means please become an educated voter or run for office but don't go around complaining about how you should be receiving more for your tax dollars because that is a mute point.

2. My children go to a private school.  People pay a lot of their hard earned money for their kids to go there.  I get it.  This is our 8th year there and we have 2 kids.  It is often a topic of conversation between my husband and I as to if we are making the right choice.  We feel that it is.  What I hate to hear is "I pay a lot of money to go to this school!"  Yes, we all do!  I especially hate it when it is in reference to why they don't want to follow the rules.  I shouldn't have to sit in a pick up line I pay a lot for my kids to go here!!  I pay a lot for my kids to go here why do I have to wait to hear which teacher they got?  It drives me insane!!  Rules are put into place so that there will not be anarchy.  When you are trying to organize 1,000 + students and their parents all at the same time there has to be some sort of structured process or it is not going to flow.  If you do not like dealing with crowds then by all means homeschool.

3. My personal favorite are the people who their very existence is one of entitlement.  They need the best spot at the grocery store, they need to not have to wait in a line EVER, they need to have the best when they want it or 10 minutes before no questions asked.  I can't deal with these people.  The only thing I can even think to say is that their mamas didn't raise them right.  I can only assume that these are the little boys and girls who never did anything wrong.  Who would cry in the grocery store to get what they want and were never told no.  I'm sorry but there is probably no hope for these people and all I can suggest is avoid them like the plague.

I'm not really sure where to leave you with this post.  Live your life as if every single thing is more than you deserved and I can guarantee that you will be happy.

Have I told you where I got this scar from?

Every morning when I get out of the shower I notice it.  It's a 4 inch scar on my stomach that came from one morning when I had just gotten out of the shower and I could hear the timer on the oven going off.  I was home alone and had put a batch of cookies in to bake while I was showering.  I knew I had to get them out or they would burn so I ran to the stove free as you please to get the cookies out.  I was home alone.  No one was ever going to know.  Until.

I grabbed the tray out of the oven turned and tripped, the edge of the hot pan touched my bare skin and branded me for life.  It's not necessarily a bad thing you know.  To have a scar.  A scar will remind you of a different time in your life.

It might have been a bad time and the lesson to be learned is that you were strong and you survived it.  It might have been a fun time that ended poorly and now you can look back on it and laugh.  Whatever the story is behind your scar it is a part of you.  It is something that happened to you and only you.

I have a friend.  She has a little girl.  To say that this person is over protective is to say that the Grand Canyon is a nice ditch. I will see her following her child around within a fenced backyard as if she is made of the finest crystal and if she touches ANYTHING she might explode.  The little girl said to me once, I'm shy!  I wanted to say No, honey you're not shy.  Just by telling me you're shy says that you are not!!

If you have been entrusted with the care of a child it is a huge responsibility, but please remember part of teaching them how to learn is to teach them how to fail.  You will not always be there to protect them or clean up after them.  Everything is not going to be perfect when they are small it's ok!  They have to start somewhere.

I am the worst!  I can't cook with my children because as they are willy nilly with the different ingredients all I can think is I'm going to have to clean that up.  I just keep reminding myself that you learn by making mistakes.  You have to crack the egg a few times to find out how to do it without getting shells in the cake.

The other night I was at a bonfire with my husband's family.  We were all to bring a story.  I was reminded of mine by the large scar it left on my face.  I can tell you the story to the tiniest of details.  I remember everything.  Now, a lot of things have happened to me in my life but it seems that the ones that have left scars are the ones that stick out.

Just remember to allow your child to have a few scars, it's good for them!