Love is a verb.

The thing about a snare is that you don't see it until you are caught up in it and there is not much you can do about it.  It's a trap.  It is meant to control you.  

Are you married?  Happily?  If not happily...why not?  

I'm all over the board here.  Let me see if I can zero it in.

My mother has a thing she says when people come to her with troubles in their marriage and they say I just don't love him anymore she says Why not?  

It always throws them for a loop.  She says love is not an emotion it is a verb and if you are saying that you don't love them anymore that means you stopped...why?  

It's true you know.  Let's say you get married, everything is perfect and fabulous and birds are singing and butterflies are flying.  It's easy to love then.  It's just the two of you, you are able to focus on each other and nothing else and everything is new and exciting and wonderful.

Fast forward 10 years.  There are a couple of kids, there is a mortgage, there are now stressors.  How are the birds?  Dead?  How about the butterflies?  Squooshed?  It isn't so easy now is it?  We tend to blame our spouse for the stressors at home.  You are going to be in the middle of a battle with just as many bombs coming at you as your spouse does and they don't always necessarily notice your "needs" as quickly as you might like so we let in that horrible little cancer called resentment.  

Please be very aware that the moment you start thinking that your spouse is to blame for your total unhappiness the devil has set his snare and you are about to step right in the middle of it.  

"We tend to seek happiness, when happiness is actually a choice." This is written on a canvas that is about 4 foot by 4 foot smack dab in the center of my living room.  Your happiness is your own choice.  

Hang on for a second though keep in mind one little tidbit.  Do you remember your vows?  Do you remember that before God and everyone you became one with this person over here that is your spouse?  Did you light a unity candle? Do some thing with sand ? However you did it when you married your spouse you became one with this person therefore your happiness is also their happiness.  Don't get me wrong you can't control their disposition but you can love them.  Go to great lengths to make sure that you have done everything in your power to make sure that they know you love them.  

Love your spouse more than you love yourself.  Love them because they are the gift that God gave only you and they are precious.  Fight for them in every way you can.  Ha!  Love really is a battlefield! Thank you Pat Benatar!  

More Zumba observations

So, It's a Monday so I had my favorite Zumba class.  The instructor is exactly what you want out of an instructor she is a specimen of physical fitness and is not judgemental or condescending throughout the entire workout.  I love her.  So, since it is Monday and I have my class that means that I have observations!!!  I was in a really good mood today so I'm sure if someone else from the class was writing this I would be on the top of the list for psycho workout wench!

1. Why is it that overly confident skinny people annoy me so bad?  A girl walks in.  She is confident.  She is physically fit.  She is looking around the room with a condescending aire.  I was so ready for her.  First song, right off the top, I knew we had a spinny thing coming and Boom she missed it.  She kept missing it.  In fact, now that I reflect on it I'm not sure she ever really did get it.

I want to take a moment to say that had she come into the class with the knowledge that she did not know the routine and she was going to need to take it slow I would not even be posting this right now, but she didn't.  She came in with an aire of I am better than you and you are in my way.  So, therefore, I judge her.

2. Why is it that skinny people are so dang competitive?  You would think that after the first three songs of trying to get the swing of things she would have realized that it ain't easy.  Nope. She just kept getting madder and madder and glaring at the people bigger than her that were getting it.

3. Let's move on to another member of this class.  Question: If you are going to completely ignore the routine that the instructor has laid before you, why are you in a class in the first place?  To this same individual I would like to yet once again state, grey workout pants = bad.  Nobody needs to see how sweaty your business is!  Stick with black!

Please remember the next time you are in a workout class.  Be humble.  Be aware. Be willing.  No one is perfect their first time of trying something.  Also, remember...I only judge you when you are mean.

Have a beautiful day!

My Story.

So, at my church yesterday the minister encouraged us to write down our "story".

I don't have much of a story.

I was born into a Christian family with both maternal and paternal sides being church going God fearing believers.  I was always taught right from wrong and once while a group from Ozark Bible College was playing music for our church service, I had this complete and overwhelming feeling of joy.  It was the weirdest feeling.  I turned to my friends and they looked at me like I was crazy but I just knew.  I got baptized shortly after that and I lived a pretty low profile life.  I didn't cuss, I didn't drink, I didn't do drugs, I didn't party.  Not because I was afraid to, but because I genuinely had no desire to.

I went away to a college that is considered a Christian liberal arts school.  LOVED IT!!  I remained somewhat low profile except I would occasionally say a four letter word for comic effect.  I still didn't drink and I still didn't do drugs.  I graduated and lived in my own apartment for a few years and then married a good Christian man and we are raising two children.

See.  Pretty boring.  I could throw in the story about how my lip fell off or about the time I was not caught for breaking and entering but they are way less exciting if I finish them so I will refrain.

I have been feeling lately that God would want me to do more with my life for his kingdom.  I know that it is by nothing that I do that he gives me his grace but I know that he also wants us to love those around us.  So, when the minister spoke of his teacher wife who has students of hers that come into class wearing the same clothes and are abused by whomever is supposed to be protecting them, it started my wheels turning, and then that night when my family was out for a warm spring evening and we ran into a homeless woman with three small children again...the wheels.

I don't know what I am supposed to be doing with this information but I'm going to figure it out.  There are people hurting out there all around us.  They are in need of the basic necessities in life.  Don't assume that there is nothing you can do look to see where you can pitch in.  You don't want your story to be they were born, they lived, they died do you?

Get out there and change the world!!

Extremely two faced.

This morning whilst in Zumba class a situation arose that had me conflicted for the entire class and all I could think was I have got to get this out of my head.  I found myself debating two sides of the same situation and not having a strong opinion either way so I will start by being extremely positive and end with being extremely negative and then let's all discuss...sound fun?  K.

Positive:
A woman came to Zumba this morning and my typical instructor allowed this woman to teach one song.  She was able to get up there and stand in front of an entire class and get through the song without any mistakes.  I say yay to her for stepping out of her comfort zone and trying something new and not messing up!

Negative:
I go to a Zumba class that is considered advanced.  The teacher is fantastic and she is extremely physically fit.  A specimen that you strive to be.  She is able to inspire you throughout the entire workout by yelling encouraging tidbits and flashing a smile.  I look forward to her class every time I can get there.  So imagine my surprise when this older woman who was not quite the physical specimen that inspires a class comes in late toting her two children.  She was wearing her hair in a style that is at least 20 years too young for her and then half way through the class my perfection of a teacher turns the class over to this woman.  The only word out of her mouth was at the start of the routine and it was Whoo.  There was no instruction or encouragement.  I assume she was training to be a Zumba instructor and you have to teach a class in order to get your certification but there was not really any instruction there so I'm not sure what was going on.  Just because you like Zumba does not necessarily mean you are cut out to be an instructor.  It takes a special kind of person to lead a class of sweaty women for an hour.

I realize how very mean I must sound but I guess my point is we were all put on this planet to do something.  If you find something you enjoy and you are good at then by all means grab that and go, but if the only reason you are doing something is because everyone else is doing it and you want to be like everyone else...Stop it.

You are fantastic just the way you are.  You can make fantastic cupcakes or you can mow a lawn like nobody's business.  Whatever you do do it well, but don't try to be something you're not.  There is nothing wrong with you!  Find something you love and do it well.  Pretty soon people will be jealous of you and they will be copying you.

I guess my thought for the day is either Stick to what you know or Whoo!

That and there should really be an age limit to pig tails.

My thoughts on Easter.

I am a user of facebook.  It is a completely simple way of keeping in touch with friends of mine that live all over the world.  I can check in with over 100 friends in less than 15 min.  What's not to love?

Well, while I am a Christian not all of my friends are.  My friends all have varying places they are in their lives.  Some believe and some don't.  Some believe but they have been so jaded by the church that their faith has been shaken.  In my walk, I have encountered many different perspectives and I feel that my experiences have led me to be more understanding and less judgemental.

So, the other day when I noticed a friend's post it kind of threw me off my footing.  It was simply stating how she was preparing herself for all the posts about how Christ is risen.  She is not a Christian. She is also a pretty fantastic person.  Great mom, talented baker, genuine friend.  I don't think any less of her for not believing what I believe.

When things like this happen in my world it makes me wonder.  I'm not so naive to believe that all others should believe the way I do.  My own family members who were brought up exactly as I was don't necessarily believe as I do so it would be ignorant to believe that all humans believe in God.  My questions come when I wonder if the reason that they don't believe is that they have never heard the truth or is it that other humans have misrepresented the truth.

Easter this year which is a very happy time in the Christian Church was sad for me.  It was rainy and stormy and all I could think of was that God was upset with us.  That's not the way he works it was just my imagination on hyperdrive, but still...  The way the world is now with sex and materialism it can't make God happy.

Today in your walk I want you to open your mind.  If there is an issue that you are standing firmly on believing that your opinion is the only right one take a moment and open your mind from the perspective of the other side.  Consider their opinion, put yourself in their place how does this change your own opinion?

Jesus was a friend to the people of his day that were considered unloveable.  He didn't just hang out with people that believed in him.  Gain a broader perspective today and go out there and show love.