Children are a gift.

This morning I found myself alone.  I had dropped my daughter off at a friend's function and the rest of my family was still asleep.  It has been a snowy week leaving the children out of school so I was more than prepared to drink in my aloneness.  I sat down at my local Panera to have an egg sandwich when my solitude was interrupted by the stern hushed voice of a man scolding his child. The child wanted to sit in a booth and the father wanted to sit at a table,  however, with the intensity of the scolding I'm sure the father's fuse was just way short.  The child was heartbroken.  He stood there with tears welling up in his eyes for a moment and then the sobbing began.  The father tried to console the child but the pain from the scolding was just too fresh.

I probably wouldn't have even noticed this little situation if it hadn't been for the week that I am coming off of.  A child committed suicide this week.  He is loved.  He has a wonderful family.  There is no sense in it at all.  What the mother of this child wouldn't give to be able to hold her son.  What she wouldn't give to be able to take the time to talk to him and see what is bothering him.  She can't though.  He is gone.  Her grief, her pain, her unanswered questions are all huge points of pain in her life right now.

Is sitting in a booth versus a table a reason to scold your child with such intensity that bystanders are hurt by your harsh words?  I'm by no means saying that children don't need to be corrected, but we as parents really need to pick our battles and evaluate what really matters.

Your child is a gift to you, a gift that is to change your heart from a self centered heart to a selfless heart.  Your child comes into this world solely relying on you for everything.  It can at times be trying at best.  We all need a break to recharge ourselves so that we can be the best we can be, but keep in mind.  Your small child does not deserve your venom.  You can be firm with your child, you can educate your child in the behaviors that you expect but if you always turn to yelling and intimidation what lesson have you taught your child?

Just keep in mind when they are screaming in the middle of Target because they aren't getting what they want.  You had to sit at the table.