Somedays I wouldn't even care what it costs and I still can't find something. I hate it with every ounce of my being. If I find something I like I buy every color they have and then play mix and match all season. I know people notice, I don't care. I'm just happy to be covering my inappropriate parts.
I tell you all of this because I have been feeling judged lately. As if this little tidbit about my personality makes me less of a person. I get that I have gained weight and I want to get it off. I do. It isn't like I enjoy being large. I feel like Kirstie Alley and I'm pretty sure I would have broken Maks. This does not make me unimportant or invaluable.
Oh I'm valuable baby, she said trying to convince herself. God put me on this planet. Now, I realize that I am the one that has done this to my body and I do want to fix it I promise, but it isn't the size that I am that makes me valuable. My ability to create humor...I may not be doing it right now but if we were to have a meal together there would be laughter. I guarantee you. I do not feel like I have accomplished my days work if I haven't at least made a person smile when they leave me. I'm also pretty sure there will be good food. If you are around me long enough I am going to get hungry and I will take you with me or leave awkwardly if you are annoying or boring me you know whichever comes first.
I am also a really good listener, well, sometimes. Sometimes I have been so starved for adult conversation that you won't be able to get a word in edgewise but I am telling you this now so that you will understand. I have decided that I would like to move to an island with very poor lighting with lots of blind people, and I would like for all the skinny people to stay home and be depressed about the fact that they are not large and in charge. This is what I have decided. Have a great day!
1 comment:
I agree 100%!!! (Not that you are large and need to lose weight, but that I am, and that we are all important, and you do make me laugh!!!) :)
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